It is a gloomy Monday. Everything in the world seems to be slowing down and speeding up at the same time. As if that is possible. I started my day off with no coffee and as you coffee fanatics know, that is never a good thing.
John and I had a tremendous fight this weekend and things are finally starting to blow over. Last night we slept in the same bed but it felt as if we were in different worlds. If you have never experienced this, let me simplify it down for you. You love this person more than anyone in the world. You care about this person more than anyone in the world. You're not even a foot away from them but you try to keep to yourself. Hoping that the other person isn't strong enough to stay away. You struggle with yourself and your heart slowly breaks with each second that you're not in their arms. All of this because the both of you are stubborn. Nobody wants to be the weak one who broke first. So you sit there all night. Close to the person you love but feeling as far away as ever.
Enough with the sad stuff guys. Let's talk about the real depressing stuff now.
It is October of my Senior Year. Can anyone think of the depressing thing that goes on during this time? College Application Time! Yay. I must admit, I am excited, nervous, and sad all at the same time. I have already started to think about which colleges I would like to apply for but I'm not completely sure on where I want to go yet. It really depends on what plan is the best for my family. I'm mainly thinking about CSUs here in California. Maybe community college. John and I have both agreed that we're tired of the Sacramento scenery. We want something different. Something that will take care of us as a family. San Diego sounds nice. Maybe San Marcos? Dominguez Hills? Let's just focus on one thing at a time.
Okay guys thanks for reading.
mother. lover. none other.